Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Rambunctious on a Tuesday Night

Last night Demanda and I had some bitching and complaining to do so we thought that the best place to do this would be a classy restaurant during happy hour.


Yes it's pretty...but we ruined it

One of our favorite things to do when we are in public is make asses of ourselves people watch. And last night was an amazing time to do that.

First off we sat next to a couple who argued for 5-10 minutes whether or not they should or should not sit in front of the fire place because it was too hot. I thought about just pushing them into the fire and yelling "now your seat isn't looking as hot as you thought!" but decided against it...frankly because I didn't want to get out of my chair. They got up about 3 times to switch seats and finally moved to a different table. After discarding the thought of throwing them in the fire, I thought maybe I should say in a pleasant voice, "seriously just sit the fuck down and enjoy some drinks!" but then they started talking to us and we ended up talking about WAAASHINGTON which anyone who knows us knows that it's our new favorite place....so that was rad.


Seriously, how could you NOT love this place?!
 
We then turned our attention to the people that sat down to our other side. They were average, just having normal conversations...much better than ours which consisted of "she's gonna go to hell!" and "let's dress up incognito for Halloween and beat the shit out of her!" (for the record, don't piss us off ). Then all of the sudden I saw Demanda look at the guy at the table, give him the weirdest look and immediately reach for her phone.  I had no idea what she was doing until I received this tweet:

Demanda- @jaymes805 - what the fuck is that guy in the red shirt wearing!?!

I looked over and almost spit out my wine. Which would have been a shame because it was pretty good wine. This guy was wearing a red short sleeved polo shirt which I had noticed when he sat down, but he had added a big black bowtie and big huge black framed glasses. Probably doesn't sound that awesome and maybe you had to be there, but this was NOT at all what I expected, seeing as the glasses and bowtie came out of nowhere. After about five seconds, the girl he was with got up and left like there was a fire in her pants (I did notice #diarrhea was trending on twitter yesterday so maybe she was the one who started it). Demanda said she heard the girl say she was leaving because she couldn't be seen with him in that outfit but I'm not so sure. He then asked the server if he could "transition to the bar" and that was the last we saw of him.

Next up there was a group of foreign people sitting behind Demanda. I wasn't sure where they were from but the guy was licking a lime from his drink like it was a vagina, no joke. I felt like I was watching some bad 80's porn because during his lime licking, he was staring creepingly (is that even a word? it is now!) at the girl sitting next to him. I almost expected her to say some bad acting line and start doing him at the table but nope! She didn't notice the guy loving his lime but then again, if a guy was doing that while staring at me, I'd pretend not to notice either. This would have been so much better if he had a mustache that curled up at the sides but he didn't.


Jackpot!

Eventually they left, she probably ran down the street as fast as she could and he probably hopped in his creeper van to drive after her. Demanda and I went back to our normal conversation about her weird dreams which I can't explain here but let's just say they made me need to go to the bathroom because I had mascara running all down my face. Which isn't a pretty look for me. Or anyone. Probably.

After a few glasses of wine and some yum appetizers (thanks Demanda!) we ventured off downtown to look for a birthday present for Demanda's boyfriend's 30th Birthday. We wandered around and couldn't find much....until we came upon these. And that's when we stopped caring about whats-his-face's birthday gift and started caring about ourselves. Which, let's face it....is always the most important thing.



I need this Eeyore hat like NOW.




She's a cat. She's a kitty cat.

True Story!




If I had one, I'd love it. Probably.




Sneaky Racoon




It's a fucking penguin!



Get'em!




I'm a bachelorette! My hat says so.


After our little hat-a-thon, we decided to venture home. But then walked back to a bar because we wanted to drink more. Then half way there decided to go home. Where we had no electricity because someone at PG&E decided we don't need do do anything productive (by productive, I mean TiVo.) We called them but they wouldn't be able to get out to our house until the next business day so we decided to occupy our time by doing this:


Jealous?

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