Dream on

Last night I was super stoked to be sleeping all cozy and warm in my own bed for the first time since last Tuesday. I know that probably makes me sound like a huge h00r but in actuality if you've read previous blog posts, you'd know that I wasn't bed hopping with a ton of men but was at my parents for the best holiday in the universe.

According to Google, this is the best holiday in the universe.
 Didn't know Fish & Chips was a holiday

As I got snuggled down in my bed, I realized I wasn't comfy nor was I warm. I struggled to sleep all night long but kept getting woken up by 3 things: bad dreams, the fact that I had to pee every 5 minutes and these bitches...

They're the devil...if the devil was furry and cute. We will blog about them at a later date. 

I'm completely used to having bad dreams because when I watched Texas Chainsaw Massacre, I had nightmares for over a year. Also, I've suffered from something called Hypnagogic Hallucinations for about 9 years now and they're f'ing terrifying. If you don't know what they are, google it. 

Like this only less funny and without the prozac

I've learned to deal with it throughout the years even though it still scares the shit out of me when I wake up seeing crap that isn't there. Frankly, I'm surprised I'm not a bed wetter. I just blink a few times, turn on the light and everything is back to normal. Aside from that, watching scary movies or talking about scary movies gives me nightmares as well so I have to stear clear of them. 


Anyway, last night I was watching some cheesy Christmas movie on Lifetime and there was a commercial for an original Lifetime movie about The Craigslist Killer. Seriously, I know you're going to think I'm a pussy but I had a nightmare about it last night. I don't remember  most of the dream but I do remember that he looked nothing like the actual Craigslist Killer. I didn't really figure out who he looked like until I was talking to LivingWEdward over on twitter today and she hit it dead on (no pun intended). 

Actual bad guy.

Dream bad guy..but with slicked back hair and a 'stache.

So LWE and I were talking about my dream which then it turned into David Hasselhoff being a killer in Forks and it got me thinking. (weird, I know. Shut up.) All the killers in Twilight are pretty hot. None of them look like the Hoff in a 'stache. Why couldn't THEY have been the bad guy in my dream??

You may have a greasy pony and look like you smell farts a lot but invade my dreams, PLEASE! 

Quick, change your ugly ass outfit and hop on over to my sleepy time! 

Too much botox but I'd still take you over the Hoff.

Hey Victoria, visit my dream so I can shave your head and make myself a wig!
(It's my dream, I'll do what I want)

I don't know what tonight holds in the dream/nightmare department but hopefully it's something a little better than last night. It would be nice if it held a certain other Twilight vampire...and even though I've already had that dream, one can only dream again. And that's what I'll do! 


Good night and sweet dreams,


-Jaymes